So, you're going to be a groom — congratulations!
Proposing to somebody (or saying yes to a proposal) takes a lot of chutzpah. By now, you've surely overcome all kinds of challenges together and powered through near-breaking points, so well done! Now, how do you survive until the big day? Here are 5 ways to make it through.
Celebrate your engagement
The first few weeks after my fiancee said yes were some of the most blissful of my life. Your friends and family are so proud, happy and excited for you that everywhere you go feels like a Phish reunion tour! Unfortunately, this time ends and then planning begins, so enjoy it while it lasts! We threw a casual party at a bar and invited all of our friends, karaoke-ed “I’ve had the time of my life” from "Dirty Dancing" and even re-enacted the classic “lift” scene. What I’m trying to say is, don’t be afraid to celebrate early!
Be reasonable on social media
A Facebook engagement post is fine (we got 349 likes on ours...but who’s counting!), but that should be about it until the wedding. If you’re doing a monthly, weekly, or daily countdown leading up to the big day, you should probably stop. Your friends will thank you. No one wants to hear about how “three and a half years ago, in book club, I met my best friend...” — we get it, you’re getting married. This especially goes out to all the people posting about their “pre-wedding, get-skinny juice cleanse.”
Get involved!
After I got engaged a friend told me, “When we were young and playing with Ninja Turtles, our girlfriends were planning out their weddings, so try and stay out of it as much as possible." What my friend didn’t know is that I was way ahead of the curve, and was playing out civil ceremonies between Raphael and Leo with the honorable Splinter presiding. My point is, I think you should be as involved as you want to be. Your wedding will be more meaningful to you if you play a major role in creating it. Find an aspect of the wedding that matters to you and totally take it over. For me, it's the DJ playlist including “Must Plays” ("Fancy") and “Must-Not Plays” ("Play that Funky Music White Boy" or anything by ACDC).
Be pro-active
Your partner will be really annoyed with you if they are always the one who brings up “wedding stuff.” Make sure that you also occasionally start wedding-related conversations, even if they are vague statements like “I’ve been thinking A LOT about signature cocktails!” Or, “Farm tables really bring everyone together!”
The couple that does boot camp together...
My fiancee keeps reminding me that “pictures last forever" — I think she is trying to hint that I should be eating less calzones in the months before the wedding. We've been working out together once or twice a week, which has been fun and a good way to take our minds off the table arrangements…Not that you need to lose any weight, you look great!
The bottom line is, it’s going to be hard, and you’re going to have to work together. Try not to let it take up all of your time. Good luck and have fun — when appropriate! And if these didn't help, check out 5 more tips to help you survive your big day:
Matt Beagle is a comedian from San Francisco, CA. He is planning his wedding in the fall, so please find him @beagle25 to discuss color palettes.