Jack Lemmon (Image credit: AFP/Getty Images via @daylife)
Leaders should show a sense of vulnerability.
This is advice I have given to many senior leaders because it shows a sense of humanity and openness, even transparency. It brings people to them because it shows that the senior leader does not have all the answers.
But does this advice apply to less senior leaders, those in middle management and below?
The answer is yes, but!
You admit shortcomings but you do with a sense of confidence. Some might say that confidence and vulnerability do not complement one another. Confidence is about exerting control of the situation; vulnerability is about reacting to the situation. But vulnerability is not weakness; it is an admission of humanity. And for that reason it is applicable to leaders at all levels.
Actors excel at projecting vulnerability. Jack Lemmon once said, “If you really do want to be an actor who can satisfy himself and his audience, you need to be vulnerable. [You must] reach the emotional and intellectual level of ability where you can go out stark naked, emotionally, in front of an audience.”
No one would advise a middle manager to strip during an important meeting, but he or she could lay bare his convictions when it comes to admitting a mistake. And it is in the acknowledgement of error where the sense of vulnerability becomes most important.
By admitting the error and accepting consequences the leader shows strength of character. He or she says I know myself and what I have done. But that’s not the end of the story. The admission must include correction, that is, what you will do to improve the situation.
Caveat: If the decision has harmed someone, you make an apology but follow up with amends, as a means of making it right. That’s why celebrity-style apologies are so meaningless. One, they begin with words like, “if I have offended anyone…” Ridiculous. Of course you have. That’s why you are apologizing. And more damning, they do not include ways they will make amends. The words may sound sincere, but the actions are limited.
There are another practical reasons why leaders need to own up to shortcomings. If you are in the middle, you want to admit it before your boss catches you. You want to get ahead of the news. One, because it is the right thing to do you demonstrate accountability. Two, you can manage the news. And it’s the management that is critical.
A savvy manager will follow the admission with the fix, that is, how he or she will take care of the issue. It is wise to be as specific as possible. That is, define the problem and its consequences. Then, delineate how you will respond with appropriate resources and application of manpower. But finally it is critical to show your boss that you are engaged and will remain so until the situation is resolved.
Such a situation demonstrates a command of the situation, and that is what managers want from their people – the ability to handle the situation. And as history shows admission of error is seldom fatal. It may even lead to future success because it shows you can be trusted to admit you are wrong and even better know how to deal with the situation.
A manager who is unaware of a mistake is worse than one who is aware and afraid to admit it. Vulnerability is the check on the process. It is a reflection of personal humility, an admission that you don’t have all the answers. Those leaders who know this and know how to respond when errors occur are those that others want to give higher level of responsibility.
