Awful Egyptians

Pharaoh Hor-Aha, reigned 62 years before he was snatched from a boat and eaten by a hippo. But, before you shed too many tears for the crinkly king, you have to remember he was probably out hunting hippos when one of them turned the tables. The biter bit. Awful Egyptians (with new cover) is available from the Guardian bookshop.

Terrifying Tudors

William Shakespeare is famous for his great plays. But they were also horrible histories. Shakespeare shockers included… a character having his eyes ripped out on stage (King Lear), a king beheaded in a sword fight (Macbeth), a real bear chasing a character off the stage (Winter’s Tale).Terrifying Tudors (with new cover) is available from the Guardian bookshop.

Rotten Romans

The British lord Caratacus fought against the Romans when they invaded. But a lot of Brits liked the Romans. Caratacus was beaten in battle and ran off to Queen Cartimandua for help. She had him wrapped in chains and sold back to his Roman enemies. Nice lady.Rotten Romans (with new cover) is available from the Guardian bookshop

Groovy Greeks

The Greek inventor Archimedes designed a death ray that burned enemy ships which tried to attack. The Romans invaders landed anyway and it was said that a Roman soldier found the inventor doing some sums with a stick on the dusty path. When Archimedes refused to leave his studies the soldier chopped him dead. That summed him up.Groovy Greeks (with new cover) is available from the Guardian bookshop.

Vile Victorians

The railways changed Britain forever but they were dangerous. The unluckiest – victim has to be Thomas Forsyth. Tom was hit by the first train to run on the Liverpool to Manchester service in 1829. He had a leg amputated and replaced with a cork one. He lived almost 30 years until a locomotive blew up the Manchester works where he was manager. He suffered a deep wound to his forehead through which, it was reported, ‘his brains seeped out’. A lump of iron had killed him instantly. Dead leg to dead head.Vile Victorians (with new cover) is available from the Guardian bookshop.

Vicious Vikings

A famously vicious Viking punishment was said to be “The Blood Eagle”. The victim’s ribs were cut from the spine and lungs spread across the back … like the wings of an eagle. But maybe the Vikings NEVER tortured anyone that way. The Blood Eagle was probably only a story meant to scare enemies into thinking the Vikings were vicious. Just a Terrible Tale.Vicious Vikings (with new cover) is available from the Guardian bookshop.

Frightful First World War

Army boots had to be tough. The trouble was the leather was so hard it gave men blisters. Old soldiers knew the answer … need ‘sweet pea’ mixture. What’s that? Pee in the boots lad and leave them overnight! You probably won’t want to try this with your new school shoes. But, if you do, remember to empty them before you put them on. Out in the new look in May!

Gorgeous Georgians

The rich Georgians dressed in gorgeous clothes. But life for the poor was miserable. In 1757 a mother and two kids in Cumberland had no bread and tried to survive on horse bran. They were all found dead one morning and the children had straw in their mouths. That same year a mother and nine children in Buckinghamshire went several days without food. The mother found some money and bought the heart, liver and lungs of a calf to make a meal. Then she went off to gather fire wood. When she got back the children had eaten every scrap, gullet and all. Out in the new look in May!

Measly Middle Ages

In 1347 Death strolled through Europe with his scythe, mowing some down and missing others. Swish! Swish! In 1349 he sailed across the Channel to the British Isles. The terrified people never knew who was going to be next. As an Italian diary recorded… There appeared certain swellings in the groin and under the armpit, the victims spat blood… in three days they were dead. These swellings began to ooze with blood and pus. Purple-black botches appeared on the skin and you smelled absolutely revolting. Swell - Spit - Smell - Swish! You were gone. Out in the new look in May!

Smashing Saxons

Crops failed? Got a rumbling tum? Some Saxons had grim ways of curing their hunger. In Sussex forty villagers cured their hunger for good. They went to the edge of a cliff, joined hands and jumped over. The ones who weren’t crushed on the rocks were drowned in the sea. It was reported that when villagers died in a famine area they were not buried by their families (as that would be a waste of good meat.) Instead they were cooked and eaten. Human hotpot saves lives. Out in the new look in May.

Cut-throat Celts

Why did the Celts cut off people’s heads in battle? Because they believed that they gained their enemy’s wisdom and strength and that a person’s power was all in their head – even if they were dead. They decorated their doors and walls with enemy heads. Often they’d scoop out the brains so they didn’t turn rotten and smelly. Out in the new look in August!

Savage Stone Age

But how do you kill a mighty mammoth or catch a herd of horses when you only have stone weapons? Use your 1550 cc brain. Stone Age people did. As early as 300,000 years ago hunters in Spain stampeded elephants into swamps and butchered them. Stone age people seem simple to us yet an elephant hunt took a lot of organising In 18,000 BC horse hunters in France used a natural cliff as a fall-trap and finished them off with clubs. Pony clubs? Out in the new look in August!

Stormin’ Normans

Norman King William I wasn’t just a Conqueror. He was a conker-er too. The Normans taught the English the game of conkers. People still play it today – clever kids play conkers but so do adults who take it quite seriously and have a world championship every year. (Are they conkers bonkers?) If you care to try it then you will be playing a game about a thousand years old Out in the new look in August!

Woeful Second World War

In Britain in 1940 the people were worried about a German invasion. Brits started to arm themselves with any weapons they got their hands on. They were known as The Home Guard. Schoolboy Alan Chadwick enjoyed going down to the local aircraft factory after school to watch the new planes being tested. As Alan cycled by the fence the Home Guard called him to stop. Alan ignored him so he fired a warning shot into the ground. The bullet bounced off the road, hit Alan in the back and killed him. Why hadn’t Alan stopped when the guard called to him? Because Alan was deaf.

And here’s the writer of Horrible Histories, it’s Terry Deary himself! Thank you Terry and illustrator Martin Brown for teaching us so much about history with all the boring bits missed out! Don’t miss out on our fabulous Horrible Histories competition. You can win six signed copies of the new look Horrible Histories books (signed by Terry himself) and an amazing stack of Horrible Histories goodies. Here’s how to enter and the Ts and Cs.