Thanks! I think it is very easy for haiku to be dull or gimmicky or precious – and when they are, there is no place to hide. Hopefully my current work is a sign that I have embraced a challenge that’s a good fit for my temperament and talent. Not a sign of masochism. We will see.
Massey Comment: Anything vaguely cheerful gets a half-step up in letter grade from me purely because it isn’t my usual mopey stuff. This one is both optimistic and a little unsettling because the metaphor doesn’t quite work. Shadows as in absence of light can’t been seen in the dark, of course. Shadows as in souls can be, and for those of us old enough to wake up in the middle of the night for no reason and then find our minds wandering, are. So the light of love casts a “shadow” different than shadows light usually cast. The fact that the meaning is unsettled and remains unsettled is what keeps this haiku from becoming “precious” which is the most damning word that can be used to describe a poem.
I am not a big fan of haikus. But I liked what I read.
Thanks! I think it is very easy for haiku to be dull or gimmicky or precious – and when they are, there is no place to hide. Hopefully my current work is a sign that I have embraced a challenge that’s a good fit for my temperament and talent. Not a sign of masochism. We will see.
This is a ‘keeper’!
Suz liked it too.
Massey Grade: B+
Massey Comment: Anything vaguely cheerful gets a half-step up in letter grade from me purely because it isn’t my usual mopey stuff. This one is both optimistic and a little unsettling because the metaphor doesn’t quite work. Shadows as in absence of light can’t been seen in the dark, of course. Shadows as in souls can be, and for those of us old enough to wake up in the middle of the night for no reason and then find our minds wandering, are. So the light of love casts a “shadow” different than shadows light usually cast. The fact that the meaning is unsettled and remains unsettled is what keeps this haiku from becoming “precious” which is the most damning word that can be used to describe a poem.