It’s time to get a new car. You:
A) Send your servant down to the Rolls-Royce dealership to exchange a cash-filled attaché case for next year’s Phantom (aka "the usual")
B) Stroll into the nearest dealership, eager to spend the afternoon locked in verbal combat with the first oily-haired, flinty-eyed, morally shattered salesman you see
C) Ask for the keys to your mom’s 1997 Plymouth Voyager.
No to all of these? Congratulations! You’re a normal dude who finds the idea of dropping five figures on a new car to be a stressful affair. But not to worry, technology has bulldozed the playing field, making it easier than ever to buy the ride you want at the price that’s right.
**STEP 1: DO YOUR HOMEWORK **
As you know, the Internet exists for over-sharing: pet videos, food photos, porn. Car information, too! No-nonsense sites like Edmunds and Kelly Blue Book list every detail, option, and nuance of the model you’re considering—and the associated cost. Want the rich Corinthian leather? (Of course you, do. You’re not an animal.) Figure out how much that’s going to add to your monthly payment. Recite these figures in your sleep or with a gun to your head. Or while sleeping with a gun to your head. This will come in handy when it comes time to negotiate—whether in the dealership or during those strange nightmares you’ve been having.
**STEP 2: FIND THE DEALER INVOICE PRICE **
This is the magic number that the dealership paid the factory for the vehicle. Dealerships and even online sellers do not want you to have this information, obviously. Fuck that noise. You can find dealer invoice at sites like Nada Guides and Edmunds.
STEP 3: DON’T SET FOOT IN A DEALERSHIP
Thank the socially anxious nerds of Silicon Valley for creating many, many websites that let you buy a car online from the reclusive comfort of your home. We dig TrueCar, a service that connects potential buyers directly with dealerships. If you’re looking for a used car, Carlypso and Beepi will connect you directly to owners whose vehicles passed rigorous quality inspections (the sites offer warranties too). Cars listed on these services may be more expensive than Craigslist, but that’s the price of an added layer of security.
STEP 4: OR SET FOOT IN A DEALERSHIP... AT THE RIGHT TIME
If you’re determined to march into the dealership—eyes narrowed and jaw clenched, like the American cowboy that you are—do so at the end of the month. This is when salespeople are scrambling to make their quotas (and maybe keep their jobs). They will be more likely to bow to your formidable charisma and cut deals that benefit you.
STEP 5: REMEMBER, YOU HAVE THE POWER
You’re the guy with the money. Feel free to walk out during negotiations, stick to your demands, or take some tread off the tires during a test drive. This isn’t exactly war, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be prepared to fight for the right set of wheels.
