Why We Shouldn't Be Afraid to Fail

Some people make no room for failure in their lives. They run from it and won't even entertain the thought of it. To do so would be a sign of weakness. A chink in their armour that opposition could exploit. "Failure is not an option" for these kind of people but how do they react when life doesn't go to plan?

Nobody gets it right 100% of the time. Nobody. Not even the greatest at what they do. Usain Bolt hasn't won every race that he has run. It took Thomas Edison thousands of attempts to invent the lightbulb. Steve Jobs was fired from the very company he eventually transformed the world with.

As a professional footballer for over a decade I understand that winning is a privilege and never a guarantee. Tackles will be missed, passes misplaced and shots off target. Defeats will inevitably happen and setbacks will be suffered. Only the individuals who demonstrate an ability to respond when faced with adversity will survive or succeed in such a cutthroat industry. The ones that don't will fall by the wayside. It's the same in any walk of life.

Last year I became the proud father of twins and it's been the steepest yet most rewarding of learning curves to experience. I marvel at the way in which my children tackle every single day as their next opportunity to acquire the new skills they need for the journey of life. They embrace the bumps in the road and the obstacles they have to overcome but they are relentless in their pursuit of improvement. It's the primary reason why children develop at such an incessant rate. 

Take mastering the art of walking for example. A child will fall, a child will falter but would we, as parents, tell them to stop and give up? Never. Instead we understand their struggle, so we patiently find ways to encourage them and share in their sheer determination to succeed. So what stops us repeating that behaviour in our own adult lives?

Somewhere along the line we forget the innocence and naivety of our youth. Tragically we learn to accept losses whilst forgetting to learn from them. We listen to the naysayers and surrender to our fate. Eventually that voice of negativity comes from within and no longer do we use the mistakes that we make to fuel our future goals. We are scarred by failure instead of inspired by it and by doing so we allow failure to be definitive and debilitating in the most destructive way.

I'm currently reading Matthew Syed's fascinating book; "Black Box Thinking" which explores the reasons behind why failure is so important. Not just for our development as individuals but for the advancement of mankind. Think Bolt. Think Edison. Think Jobs. 

If we are unable to see the error of our ways how can we expect to produce a different result? Pride cannot come into the equation and an individuals ego may well be bruised but if progression is the aim then doesn't the end justify the means? 

By identifying where we can become better we give ourselves the best possible chance to move forwards. Sometimes that will require the guidance or the wisdom of others so remaining open and willing to accept new ideas is paramount for personal growth.

"Failing to learn is not an option." Now there's a mantra that I would choose to live by.

#selfdevelopment #marginalgains #personalgrowth #improvement #mindset #success