Take Stock of Your Empty Nest – and Create A Life You Love
Now that your children are grown, what do you want to bring into this new season of your life? Are you ambivalent about making decisions? Do you know what will bring you deeper satisfaction and joy? These are all common questions for those entering this new life phase. It’s time to put the focus on You again, because this will help you discover the pathway to creating a life you love. Taking stock of where you are in your life is the beginning of building that life.
When I refer to “taking stock”, I mean “identifying where you are at emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually”. Self-inquiry in these important areas helps you know yourself on a deeper level and opens up a whole new self-discovery process. It can uncover what’s most important to you, help you discover who you’d most like to surround yourself with, and ultimately lead you to a more self-actualized place.
Start by reflecting on the following questions. Allow time for this exercise, and the deeper answers will surface. If the answers don’t come immediately, just wait and revisit them each day for the next several days until they do. If they don’t, keep going back to them every few days. If this work is new to you, that’s okay – it’s a practice. Over time, you’ll be able to answer these kinds of questions more easily.
Where are you at in your life right now?
Emotionally
- What am I feeling about being in my empty nest?
- What is my greatest fear?
- What am I looking forward to?
- What are my feelings about this overall transition?
- What do I feel about where my children are at in their lives now?
Physically
- On a scale of 1-10 (10 being the highest), how would you rate you overall health?
- Are you satisfied with how your body is working?
- Is there one thing you can think of that, if you changed it, would make you feel a lot better physically? If so, what is it?
- Are you eating a healthy diet? What kind of exercise do you enjoy?
- Are you recovering from an illness? If so, what do you need to do to take extra good care of yourself?
Mentally
- What thoughts are you having today? (e.g., “I don’t know how my life will ever compare to raising children”, “I look forward to creating a connected relationship with my adult children”, etc.)
- What do you believe about your life currently? (e.g., “I am going to make it through this”, “I can create the life I’ve always wanted after raising children”, etc.
- List 5 of your most positive beliefs.
- List 5 of your most negative beliefs.
- Are you depressed or anxious? (If you are, I recommend that you seek help from a professional to address what’s going on.)
Spiritually
- What is your core Self telling you?
- Do you believe in a higher power?
- Do you feel drawn to explore spirituality?
- What are your beliefs about spirituality?
- What comforts you if you are struggling or going through a difficult time?
Write the answers to these questions and other thoughts and ideas that come up into a journal. These questions will help you learn the deeper things happening within yourself. You can add your own questions and categories, or set it up to work for you and journal about whatever is coming up for you now. Using this powerful tool is the first step to bringing true joy into your life. When you know the truth of where you’re at, you can deal with it directly and gain more perspective on yourself and the choices available to you.
If you’re in a difficult or complacent time in your life, know that change is possible withalittle concerted effort. If you’re content, you can make your life even better if you want to live more full-out. Either way, you can create a life you love by being committed to figuring it out – and it all starts here.
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