I work at a local Starbucks and will be giving y’all tips about the common misconceptions as well as the “do’s and don’t’s” that the baristas wish you knew. Keep checking back at The Hub@TTU over the rest of the semester for more, and I will reveal my name at the end of the semester, so y’all can bring me tips!
See the other “As Told by Your Barista” Installments:
As Told By Your Barista 1: Difference between a Caramel Macchiato and a Latte
As Told By Your Barista 2: Coffee & Crème-Based Frappuccinos
For this edition of As Told by Your Barista, I am going to explain the Starbucks “secret menu” through “Gilmore Girls” (the greatest TV show ever) GIFs.
Whenever you walk up to the register with a sly smile on your face, like you have the biggest secret in the world…
…and say the words living in a barista’s worst nightmare, “So, I want this drink off of the Secret Menu.”
It kind of, sort of really grinds our gears.
Let me fill you in on a little secret… THERE IS NOT A “STARBUCKS SECRET MENU.”
No, I’m serious.
Whatever recipes you find online claiming to be the “Secret Menu” are concoctions individual baristas have created through experimentation.
Every single barista in every single Starbucks doesn’t know what goes into every single made-up drink.
If you have the recipe, we’d be happy to make it for you.
Because, some of us do enjoy making the special drinks. (My favorite is ordering the Strawberries and Cream Frappuccino with Toffee Nut and Java Chips. It tastes like Cap’n Crunch cereal.)
One thing you should know is we cannot cross contaminate the blender. (In other words, we cannot put food inside of the blender.)
I know; the Internet lied to you.
I’m sorry I crushed your dreams of a “Secret Menu.”
But, you had to be set free from all the lies.
So, the next time you go to your neighborhood Starbucks, leave off the part about a “Secret Menu” while ordering. Just bring the recipe for what you want. Your baristas will appreciate it.
XOXO,
Your barista
#TeamJess
P.S. If you are looking for something new to try, ask your barista for his or her favorite concoction. We deal with these ingredients on a daily basis and would love to share the love.
[All GIFS are courtesy of giphy.com]