St. Augustine cancer survivor grateful for the kindness of strangers

The kindness of a stranger has saved Frank Palumbo's life - twice.

Palumbo started feeling sick around Christmas in 2005.

He was taking time off from his job designing tools as a mechanical engineer for Northrop Grumman.

He had never been prone to staying home from work.

"I was invited over to a friend's house just before New Year's, and that's when things started happening," he said.

Palumbo began getting respiratory infections. He also developed a rash on his stomach and was exhausted.

Steroids for the rash didn't do anything. Antibiotics helped with the respiratory infections, but only briefly.

On Feb. 13, 2006, the day before his 42nd birthday, Palumbo was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia (AML) and was admitted into a Jacksonville hospital.

"I was sure that was it," Palumbo said. "I was sure that I wouldn't be coming out of that hospital the day I went in."

Palumbo was a smoker back then. He said the day he was admitted into the hospital was the day he quit.

But quitting would be the least of his troubles. His story since is a reminder there are people out there who give and ask for nothing in return.

After months of chemotherapy and radiation treatment, Palumbo's cancer went into remission.

"Your heart feels like it's going to pound out of your chest," he said. "You're just sitting in your bed and you're doing a light jog, all the time."

In March of 2007, he relapsed.

He was informed he would need a bone marrow transplant. A search for a donor began with his two sisters, who were perfect matches to each other, but not with him.

He was put on the list for the Bone Marrow Donor Program. Five months of additional chemo and radiation therapy ensued to keep the cancer dormant.

A match was finally found on the international donor list. He had to leave his family behind in St. Augustine to get the transplant in Hackensack, N.J.

His brothers-in-law took turns driving Palumbo to New Jersey, a two-hour ride from Long Island, N.Y., for treatment.

"They would take their own time from their jobs to take me and bring me back," he said. "Not everyone can just stop what they're doing to be able to do that."

Grateful, grateful

Palumbo tried several times to locate his donor through the program but was always unsuccessful. The donor has remained anonymous.

"It's hard for me to believe a person wouldn't want to know, unless they had passed on," he said. "But there's no way of me knowing or them telling me."

All Palumbo knows is that he was of European descent.

"I wish he would have come forward," he said. "He will never know how grateful I am."

Five years went by. Palumbo was cancer-free and had a new appreciation for life.

"For everything bad that happened to me, a lot of good came out of it," he said. "... There are no guarantees."

A second time around

In October 2012, Northrop Grumman flew Palumbo and his wife, Sue, to Long Island for a company celebration. It was his 25th year with the company.

He visited his parents and decided to return to his transplant hospital for a five-year checkup.

"I've got my free ticket and I feel fine. Nothing wrong with me. I feel great," he said.

But when the blood work came in, the doctors didn't like what they found. Palumbo was again diagnosed with AML and would require an additional bone marrow transplant.

"I didn't even want to go through it again. I didn't," he said.

His brother-in-law, Gary, talked some sense into him.

When he had first been diagnosed, Palumbo's younger daughter Amanda was 16 years old. Nicole, his oldest, was 19.

"They didn't know much that first time," he said. "The second time around, my oldest was pregnant, and she was pretty emotional," he said.

Palumbo decided he couldn't miss seeing his granddaughter.

Coordinators for the donor program said they didn't want to reach out to his first donor, but wouldn't elaborate why.

Palumbo received another round of chemo in Gainesville and his leukemia went into remission. Seven long months went by before another donor was found.

He had his second transplant in June 2013. The new donor went with the more painful extracting of stem cells via the spine, which produces a better grade sample.

This time, his donor came forward.

Reaching out

In June this year, Palumbo received an email from her, which said he was in her and her family and friends' prayers all the time. She hoped that one day they would be able to meet.

She had been on the registry because she had a friend who knew someone in need of a transplant long before.

"They didn't even get the opportunity to get the transplant, so she went on with her daily life and forgot about it," he said. "But when she got the phone call, she didn't even think twice."

He learned that his donor was Karen Membrino, a single mother from Massachusetts working two jobs.

"I hear all of this and it just made me feel so bad that this great person saved my life and I can't do a darn thing about it," he said.

Insult to injury

In August, although his doctors advised him against traveling with a weakened immune system, Palumbo flew to New York. He wanted to visit his father, who was recovering from a major surgery.

His family contacted Membrino without his knowledge and made plans for her to come to Long Island to meet him.

They offered to put her up or pay for a hotel, which she refused. She said she had vacation time and would feel funny staying with them or his parents. She said she would come and stay in a hotel nearby.

But Membrino came down with the shingles virus. Doctors told Palumbo's family his immune system was too weak for them to meet in person.

When he learned of his family's failed attempt to bring them together, he worked up the courage to call Membrino.

They now speak on the phone, text message each other and keep in contact with each other regularly on Facebook.

"I still want to meet her," he said. "... I still want to do something for her. I don't know what, but start it here, maybe."

Palumbo said his story isn't really about him and that there are more people than he can thank. For him, it's about the donors and those who give unselfishly.

"Who knows what the reasons are?" He asked. "Nevertheless, there are still good people out there who, in general, we're forgetting about."