How to Post Your Wedding Photos on Instagram

“Are you even engaged if you didn’t post your proposal on Instagram?” is a real-life question I was asked after getting engaged. I believe this question was posed as a joke, but it does spark conversations about proper Insta etiquette at a time of wedding photo overload. Today, Instagram has infiltrated every one of life’s milestones: graduations, birthdays, engagements, even deaths. (The #funeral hashtag is a somber but very real thing.) Perhaps the most Instagrammable milestone, however, is The Wedding."

It only seems appropriate, then, to share a new list of suggested rules for #WeddingSeason.

Hard to believe, but there was once a time when you got engaged and had to just hope you’d run into your loved ones (or not-so-loved ones) to show off your new ring. These days, however, we’re in the habit of sharing everything from our latest manicure to the post-workout green smoothies, so it seems only natural that a nuptial (be it your own wedding or someone else’s) would also be a prime subject for social media.  And while it certainly is a milestone worth sharing with your followers, there are a few general rules to consider before hitting the “post” button.

Below, some guidelines for matrimony media covering the entire wedding season. It’s best to know how to post wedding photos on Instagram or you could risk ending up as a screenshot in a group chat—of people who secretly just want to be invited to your wedding. 

The Engagement Post 

Seeing as how “the engagement post” is your first announcement of the wedding-related posts to follow, it’s important to set the right tone. A few general rules include:

This could come across a little braggy, and perhaps most importantly, will leave people wondering: who’s the mystery person that gave you said diamond? Oh and, please, save us from the engagement ring slideshow. We don’t need to see every single angle. All it will do is make it very obvious just how long you spent taking these photos.

#ISaidYes may seem like the obvious choice, but there is nothing more predictable—of course you said yes. (Imagine the drama of a “No” post!) Personally, I’m a fan of something short and sweet like “Soft launch,” “I love this for him,” or “Does this ring make me look engaged?” Another option: share your proposal story in a few lines. 

Nothing makes it more obvious that you’ve been sitting on that one since the second date.  A premature wedding hashtag is the digital equivalent of scribbling your name next to your crush’s last name on your notebook without ever having actually spoken to him. Besides, using a hashtag too soon can result in getting spammed by wedding vendors. 

If your S.O. has gone the extra mile by hiring a professional photographer or a friend to capture the moment, as well as the proposal prep, why not put it all together in an Instagram reel? FYI: An engagement-versary isn’t a thing. It’s just not.

The Bachelorette Party Highlights

Sure, it’s bound to be an indulgent and fun weekend full of spicy margaritas and sparkly tiaras, but let’s be real, not everyone wants to see countless slideshows of you and your friends doing body shots and singing Taylor Swift (or be seen in those kinds of photos, for that matter). Shared iPhoto galleries and Airdrop were perhaps invented for the bachelorette party; a safe place to share the weekend’s highlights with a pre-approved group.

If your bachelorette party has its own hashtag, make sure that everyone is prepared to be featured in these photos publicly.  I personally hope to keep any photos from my future bachelorette well hidden from the public’s (and my parents’) eyes.

We know the drill—bridesmaids in matching bikinis with the bride’s name on it, in a line-up by the pool, and making the bartender take several versions of the same group shot. Why not nominate one person to post, tag the whole crew, and call it a day?

The Wedding Planning Log

No matter how excited I am about your upcoming nuptials, I do not need to be reminded each day that there are only “276 days until I do!”  

Save the dress deliberations for the group chat with your bridesmaids and besties. They will be just as excited as you are, and these are the opinions that should matter. Do you really want opinions from the rest of us on the Swarovski crystal-encrusted pale pink and purple veil? (It’s a no from me.)

The Wedding Day Photo Dump 

I'll be honest, the wedding hashtag has always confused me a bit. Who are these hashtags really for? I’d like to assume that you already follow the people on your guest list, and most of them follow each other, so wouldn’t they already be seeing all the lovely pics of you feeding cake to your newly betrothed? Truthfully, the hashtag is for strangers and people who weren’t invited.  

I think we can all admit to clicking on a hashtag and going down the rabbit hole of a wedding we weren’t invited to; and isn’t it a bit strange having not been at said wedding but still knowing that the heart-shaped cake was actually made out of teeny tiny red velvet cupcakes (the groom’s maternal grandmother’s favorite flavor) and the bride’s godfather sang “Fields of Gold” for their first dance (her godfather is Sting, conveniently).

No one needs to see 137 photos tagged with #MrandMrsWhootersplatSayIDo or #HappilyEverDumasses or #HolySchmidtWereGettingMarried (actually that one’s pretty good…).

The Honeymoon Insta Stories

I’m all for sharing travel photos and I would love to see your pics from the Seychelles, but I don’t need to see Every. Single. Second. Give us a sneak peek, and save the rest for your photo book.

If I’m able to relay that you had a refreshing papaya and mango smoothie for breakfast, then went swimming with dolphins, then had a life-changing fish curry for lunch served by the most amazing waiter named “Shawn” followed by nap time, then you’re doing it wrong.  Let us know you are alive and in love, make us a little jealous because we are probably at our desks eating a sad salad, but then save the rest of the memories. The second you get home you can make a honeymoon video and host a screening for the few people who will actually want to see it all.

After the Big Day

I know once the wedding photos come in, it’s tempting to share them all and remind us that your special day was the best wedding and only #SevenMonthsAgo, but don’t. Put them in a wedding album and save it for the grandkids, or share one Instagram photo on the occasional anniversary.

An actual anniversary (a year since the day—that’s the definition of an anniversary) is a legitimate milestone.  But does anyone else feel like we’ve reached peak anniversary post?  Have we reached the point where if you don’t post a pic and tell us how the past year has been the best of your life and you can’t wait for what’s to come, we’ll all think that you aren’t happy? Before social media, anniversaries were celebrated in private. You probably wouldn’t invite all 1,876 of your Instagram followers to your anniversary dinner, would you? Rather than telling us about your best friend and how all the ups and downs of the past year have made you so much stronger, maybe just tell your partner, to their face.

“I can’t believe it’s been eleven and a half weeks since this amazing night!” Really? How odd because that’s literally how time works!

Dear Wedding Guests, 

Are you going to rewatch these vows again and again? No, you are not. Let’s put the phones down for the ceremony, shall we? As a bride, I hope to see all my friends’ smiling faces when I look out into the crowd, not their smiling iPhones (and my aunt’s flash accidentally going off 11 times).

“Shout!” is indeed a real crowd-pleaser, but we’ve all danced to “Shout!” at a wedding. Throw your hands in the air, kick your heels up, do the Shout till you can’t Shout—just don’t share it on social media.

With these notes in mind, go forth and partake in cake, and flower tossing, and all the trappings of the season. After all, people do love love, so share highlights from the 14 weddings you are attending this year. Just try to keep these notes in mind, or risk a few Instagram divorces…