I used to not really care about Natalie Portman beyond her fashion choices and her awards-hustling. But as her awards-hustling and fashionista days have subsided, Natalie’s grown into a woman who does not give a f–k. And I like that. I like her more now that she uses her platform to call out sexism and assholery on a regular basis. Natalie sat down with Harper’s Bazaar UK to chat about her work as a producer and narrator on the documentary Eating Animals, but she starts the interview by steering the conversation to Moby’s memoir, in which he claims that he had a brief romance with Natalie when she was 20 and he was 33. Not so, says Natalie. Some highlights from Bazaar UK:
On Moby’s book: “I was surprised to hear that he characterised the very short time that I knew him as dating because my recollection is a much older man being creepy with me when I just had graduated high school. He said I was 20; I definitely wasn’t. I was a teenager. I had just turned 18. There was no fact checking from him or his publisher – it almost feels deliberate. That he used this story to sell his book was very disturbing to me. It wasn’t the case. There are many factual errors and inventions. I would have liked him or his publisher to reach out to fact check.”
What really happened when she met Moby: “I was a fan and went to one of his shows when I had just graduated. When we met after the show, he said, ‘let’s be friends’. He was on tour and I was working, shooting a film, so we only hung out a handful of times before I realised that this was an older man who was interested in me in a way that felt inappropriate.”
On Believe Women: “There’s a real collective force when so many women come together. It’s a shame that it requires so many of us to be heard, but the force of it has the same force of a legal statement being implemented. Whatever happens in the court with Harvey Weinstein, whatever happens because of these laws that don’t protect us or the truth of survivors, the spoken truth and courage of women coming forward has the ability to change hearts and minds about what a person is capable of and how to protect others from him, and stop him from being able to flourish.”
On producing & narrating Eating Animals, about factory farming, and becoming vegan: “I was vegetarian before, and had eaten eggs and dairy and I thought, ‘that doesn’t really hurt animals, it’s a natural bi-product of an animal’ which I still believe if you’re on a nice farm and have a few chickens, but the vast majority of animals are raised in such devastating way. It’s devastating for the animals of course, but also for the environment. I was changed by it and it made me feel that it was urgent to, not just change the way I was, but also to spread the word.”
On the pushback from the documentary: “No one likes being taught to told what to do. We wanted to show how this affects people’s lives and to focus on these humans who are living with the reality of factory farming. The incredible thing with the vision that Jonathan and Christopher put forward is that if everyone just adjusted their diets a little bit – it doesn’t have to be taking on a whole different identity and be 100 percent of the time – but if people cut out meat once a day or once a week, it would make an incredible difference to the environment and to the welfare of animals.”
That’s a giant EW on Moby. That’s gross and I’m glad she’s calling him out. She was barely 18 and a 30-something Moby was creeping on her and trying to date her and she was like “no thanks.” And then he includes her in his book, almost like he wants to claim her as one of his conquests? Gross gross gross. As for the factory farming and becoming vegan… she’s been vegan for years, hasn’t she? She talks about it like it’s a recent thing that came about with this documentary. Let me look it up… yeah, she was a vegan back in the day, then she shifted to vegetarianism for many years – like, 2011-2018 – and I guess she’s gone back to veganism. Her choice, but I hope she goes easy on the “dairy is rape” comparisons.
Update: Moby responded and it’s gross.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
I mean, he shouldn’t have done that and I think it’s a weird implied thing from him, but I have no issue with an 18 year old and a 33 year old. or a 20 year old and a 33 year old, and that’s not ‘inappropriate’ if it’s mutual and certainly not creepy. it is pretty much normal and it sounds like he was interested in her and she wasnt interested in him, but that doesn’t make it creepy. she stopped hanging and that’s that. he shouldnt have put it in his book because, who the F cares that you tried to date portman at one point. he’s an idiot for putting it in there or implying anything happened if it didn’t. just wanting to parse what exactly is inappropriate here because it seems all male attention at this point is inappropriate.
She felt like it was inappropriate though so if that’s how she felt then it was. You can’t tell her that she shouldn’t feel that way because you don’t find in inappropriate. When I was 18 if some 30 something was coming onto me I would feel really uncomfortable because back then 30 something seemed old to me.
I am not saying she is wrong to feel it was inappropriate for her. I am parsing the idea that a 33 year old is inappropriate for hanging with an 18 year old, if the 18 feels it is appropriate. I am using critical thinking skills.
Oh, “critical thinking skills.” Sorry guys, just a troll. Carry on.
+1
I’m actually not a troll; I am a longstanding reader and commenter on this website, and it resorting to name-calling simply because you disagree with what I am arguing is not cool. I’m reacting to her comment, not trolling anyone. and I clarified what my comment was to Mel M.
Well, you used the tried and true go-to phrase of the trolls, then. It implies that Mel M the rest of us aren’t critical thinkers which is also “not cool,” so please excuse me for getting my hackles up.
I’d have to kind of agree. I can certainly understand her finding it creepy, but that doesn’t mean every person would. It’s a 12-year age difference between two adults, so to me that’s not inherently creepy. But subjectively, it certainly could feel creepy to some people.
Sorry, it is creepy. At 16, i was ay my first job and getting looks from guys in their 30s. Gross, i was really taken aback and didn’t know what to do. I don’t see it as being any different at 18. A so called man at 33 would not date an 18 year old. A creep looking to get laid would. Guys that age interested in an 18 yr old are doing it because the 18 yr old is naive and easy to talk into bed. At that age, I was that young and naive enough to believe a guy loved me, not that he was saying it just to get laid. And that 33 year old ghy knows that. Easy picking for creepy, unscrupulous “men.”
Natalie says he was creepy and they didn’t date and she wished his people would have fact checked b4 putting it in the book….but wheres her evidence that hes lying? Just cause she said so? Now we’re expected to believe her versus the idea that she had a brief infatuation with her idol, grew up, regretted it and is now trying to rewrite history? Im asking a legit question. In my eyes its all he said she said. No one wins in this
18 and 33 is creepy. She just graduated high school and he is 15 years older almost double her age man.
Exactly. My thoughts if I was in her position would be what could this guy possibly have in common with me and what are his motivations. If one of my male friends at that age was hitting on 18 year olds I would be grossed out and say something. Even if the 18 year old was fine with it the 33 year old has no business starting that though because they should know better.
I just think it’s taking advantage of ones youth and the knowledge that they may feel intimidated to say anything to an older person about how they feel uncomfortable. Or they may feel “special” because this older person singles them out. The whole dynamic just doesn’t sit right. 15 years isn’t always an issue but when one party is that young it is.
Yeah, its creepy. a 40 year old and a 55 year old is a lot less creepy (I would say not creepy at all), because the “life experience” gap is a lot less.
YES
It’s legal but it’s creepy. Over 30 year old going after a fresh out of school teenager is gross.
While sure it’s legal, I’m not convinced a 33 year-old dude pursuing a teenager is “appropriate.” Sounds like she didn’t find it appropriate, and yet he still put it in his book. I think that says enough.
I have an 18yr old niece and if a grown ass 33yr old man was trying to hit on her and knew she was 18 yes that is creepy and beyond inappropriate. That’s high school just graduated high school territory and grown ass men should know better. The only 30yr olds going for teens are those hoping these girls won’t know any better and think their age makes them more interesting and experienced…it doesn’t, it’s Creepy AF
“But I have no problem with a 18-year-old and a 33-year-old”
What !, You do not have a problem that a 33-year-old man flirt with a young woman who has just come out of the teenager? Really!
If the majority was not set at age 18 most of his men will go out with young girls 16-year-olds or14-year-olds. I say that because when I was 15 /18 years old I had men in their thirties and forties who flirt with me,and it’s was just scary .
It s not because it s not illegal it s not wrong or creepy or creating an unhealthy power balance due to the difference in status and maturity.
33y old should stay the hell away of under 20s at the very minimum.
That age gap isn’t creepy if she’s 33 and he’s 48. But when she’s 18, barely out of high school, her brain not fully mature and he’s hitting on her, it absolutely IS creepy. It wasn’t consensual. She did not want his advances. He was preying on a teenager and then lied about it in his book. This is not about the age gap itself. It’s about her agency and your take is bad.
“just wanting to parse what exactly is inappropriate here because it seems all male attention at this point is inappropriate.”
This comment…oof.
Natalie felt it was creepy and inappropriate. That’s all we need to know about that particular situation. Believe her when she’s talking about her own experience.
In general? I feel if you’re old enough to have a teenage child yourself, you shouldn’t be looking to date teenagers. And if you aren’t able to determine if your behavior is appropriate or not, chances are it’s not.
He was likely being inappropriate because I simply can’t see him being an 18 year old’s go-to type. Men need to be realistic about what women will be interested in them.
@perplexed +1
Have you read his comments about Lana Del Ray? He’s also saying they “dated”, but essentially she kept turning him down when he tried to sleep with her and he said it was because she didn’t want to be just another one of the many women he slept with. It was THE MOST self serving rejection excuse, and no doubt not what really happened.
The only thing I have heard about his book is him bragging about women. It’s really, really gross.
He was a 33 year old super-star hitting on a girl barely out of high school. At 18 she wasn’t savvy enough to realize his intentions and misinterpreted his come-on as simply wanting to be friends but soon realized he had more on his mind that simply hanging out.
That type of male attention was and is completely inappropriate and he was clearly capitalizing on his fame to impress her into a relationship she was not willing to get into.
Agree!
And to all the people saying 33 and 18 isn’t bad…
How about 32 and 17?
31 and 16?
30 and 15?
See where I’m going with this?
And besides the age… where’s the consent?
Natalie is saying she didn’t give it beyond being a fan agreeing to friendship. I believe her.
This entitled douche should have read her interview and been like- “Sorry Natalie! I clearly misread the signs. I thought we were dating. I wish I hadn’t made you feel uncomfortable. Moving forward I will be sure to be more clear about my intentions and ask for consent! “
Ugh- instead he tried to shame her and prove her wrong.
Gross. Just gross.
This is besides the point of your comment, but I am so embarrassed by how many people now abuse the term “critical thinking skills” when they are simply stating their own opinion. What critical thinking techniques have you employed in reaching your conclusion that dating a high schooler is not “creepy”? Like… you know words have meaning, right? You can’t just call anything “critical thinking” – it has a specific meaning/process!
I honestly blame Youtube personalities. I don’t really care to debate the age of consent, I’m just so frustrated because I see people abusing terms like “logic” constantly lol.
Right? You’re never going to be able to “parse” the specifics of what someone is feeling using “critical thinking skills” and logic. Employing those terms is just a strategy to shut down an argument. It really rubs me the wrong way, too, but I guess it’s “not cool” for me to say that.
If you go back to what I wrote, I said I had no problem with her interpretation that his attentions were creepy. TO HER. my only point was that I do not think it is fair to say that any time a male of 33 and a female of 18 get together in a sexual or otherwise way, that it is always creepy. that is what I was parsing, and that is what i was critiquing. I was in no way trying to use critical thinking skills to parse what she is feeling. I was trying to preempt what inevitably followed, which is a bunch of people piling on about how it is always creepy for a person who is 13 or 15 years older than someone else to be interested in them sexually, and that 18 year olds somehow have no agency and should never date a 33 year old. For her it felt gross, fine. And I said he should have left this out of his book because it does him no favors (except for getting us all to talk about it and drive publicity for his book)
It is in fact, not cool to call someone a troll when they are engaging in reasoned speech, and not attacking anyone. For me to say I am thinking critically about something does not mean I am insulting you. I also have never watched any youtube personalities. I’m female, 38, and well-educated and do not get my thoughts and opinions from youtube stars.
Well, fair enough, but I really don’t think there is a critical way to parse why most people seem to be having a visceral reaction to this dynamic and you aren’t. I called you a troll because your language cues suggested to me that you were trolling, and because it seemed over-the-top to me to suggest that an 18-year-old dating a 33-year-old is “pretty much normal.” In my experience it isn’t, and I interpreted that to mean that you were not serious. Based on my past experiences with internet comments, I came to a logical conclusion about your post. The content of your post suggested troll to me. I do understand what you are saying, it just doesn’t seem like something you can break down logically.
@bros, no, not all male attention is inappropriate at this point? I think we thought you were a troll because that’s something many men say – that they can’t parse the difference, because they are social bumblers, and yet, we should trust them to create laws, run the nation, be CEOs, and perform other complex social interactions Someone posted a really good article called, I think, “the myth of the male bumbler.” Men like Moby know when they are being a friend or delusional that a woman likes them, but it makes him seem more powerful to have dated Portman when she was young.
Is it possible you have some unresolved issues on this type of relationship because you dated someone much older when you were younger?
I read a rolling stone article back in the day about Moby and they mentioned that Natalie Portman was at his show and that she was his girlfriend, surely she could have refuted this at the time if it was untrue. I feel like she’s embarrassed about dating him when she was young and is now denying it.
Um power dynamic again. If you’re 18 you might be pretty surprised about an older guy saying that about you and honestly not know what to do. Maybe she thought ignoring it was better. Probably true that if Moby is going to act like this, ignoring him completely is the right thing to do.
PS way to put the responsibility for a guy’s creepy behavior on the woman.
Large age gap attention is inappropriate when one party is a teenager. It shouldn’t require much, ‘parsing’ for someone to recognise the fundamental power imbalance. Hence the creepiness.
A 33 year old has no business going after an eighteen year old romantically. The age and experience gap is too vast to allow any sort of equality in the relationship and inherently skews the dynamic in the older partner’s favor. The teenager is still learning who the are. The adult is settled by that point. There is no level of justification that removes the intrinsically predatory implications.
*I* am 32 years old and find the thought of pursuing a teenager frankly repulsive. They are not even blips on my radar. As it should be because I’m a mature adult with an established life. Anybody in my age group looking for a partner that young isn’t looking for a partner at all. They’re looking for somebody to control. No critical thinking required – just common sense understanding of red flag behavior.
@Bros I get what you were saying. it doesn’t sound like you were trolling at all. Some people just think people with a different opinion are “trolls.” I thought you were respectful in your comments.
I think what makes Moby creepy is the fact he took the excitedness of a young Natalie as flirting and its troubling that he didn’t have the maturity at his age to know the difference between a young girl being just a fan and flirting. Thats a bit creepy IMO.
Also, although there are plenty of examples of 18 year olds that go out with 30 year olds, I just don’t think that’s really appropriate. I mean Natalie just graduated from HS.
Bros are you fucking serious that is a big age gap between 18/20 or 33. It’s gross for men or women to date ppl that young. Moby is gross for wanting to date Natalie.
I agree that this age gap isn’t necessarily inappropriate in the grander scheme of things. People are entitled to their personal feelings but projecting that on everyone else and every situation is wrong.
There is a giant power imbalance that happens when an adult dates a teenager. It’s not okay and it’s part of the patriarchy to believe that dating a teen when you are a full on adult is okay.
It’s creepy. The younger you are, the more important age difference is, because your experiences are so limited and your personal boundaries are not yet formed – which is why young people are so vulnerable. If you do not know this, you are not neither thinking critically, and you are certainly not living empathetically.
Moby has always creeped the eff outta me so am not surprised by this. Plus don’t these stories about him and teenage girls go way back? Wasn’t there a MeToo story about him?
Good for her for calling him out.
He definitely seems like a guy who doesn’t understand or respect boundaries. He’s been posting pictures him and Natalie together after her statement, like he thinks he can bully her into changing her mind. WTF dude.
I’ve always liked her, sat across from her at a v small restaurant once years ago, when she was prob about 18, and her intelligence and radiance then were v striking.
It sounds like she’s matured a bit on the ridiculous comparisons. I certainly hope that’s the case, anyway.
She looks different…for a minute I thought it was Giada D.
They’ve always looked alike to me so I get that comparison.
yeah, I think she tweaked her nose again. that’s what I noticed; it looks smaller.
Why is an 18 yr old girl hanging out with a 33 yr old man in the first place? I guess neither one of them really got that it wasn’t the most appropriate thing to do.
She stated she was a fan so that’s why she met him. But I see the victim blaming you did there, it was her fault bc she was hanging out with an older man??? Really??
if what she says is true, then she’s no victim. she wanted to meet her idol, she met him, he wanted more, she drew the line, it was all over. I am not a fan of men who go after teen girls, that makes me lose all respect for them and see them as immature and disgusting, but he didn’t assault her. if he did manipulate her in some way, that’s bad, but we’ll never know.
Yes, but the blame should be placed on the 30-year-old, in my opinion. What well-adjusted person wouldn’t shut that nonsense down?
Victim blaming, ugh.
There’s nothing wrong with her meeting a musician she liked, and even being friends with him. The problem is him trying to move beyond friendship with an 18 years old girl, then claiming they dated, and then doubling down with a creepy AF photo and comments when she said they did not date. Natalie didn’t do anything wrong in this situation.
Ugh! Exactly!
I think his follow up post proves he’s a still a creep!!!!
So you’re saying it wasn’t OK of her to expect they would just be friends? That she should have known he would hit on her? She started off trusting his motives but soon realized he wanted more and cut things off. Nothing wrong in her behaviour at all. He, however, should have known better.
I don’t know that an adult hanging out with another adult is creepy and wrong.
Damn. I had a thing for Moby. I’m not sure if I’m more creeped out by him or my lack of judgement.
@kaiser- Moby responded with an IG post to defend himself… with a picture that totally doesn’t say I was an older guy inappropriately creeping on a young female adult and making her uncomfortable.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BxwubzJhaq2/?igshid=rr05brngtr7a
thanks, I added an update! He’s gross.
Photo evidence? Doesn’t he make it sound like he has pics of them being intimate?? Like dude I have pics of me and friends at dinner but that doesn’t mean I was dating my friend! This just proves he’s a creepy dude who wanted to bang a teen when he was in his 30s!! Dude you’re making it worse
omg this photo is so creepy. put a shirt on! i can’t believe he’s trying to argue about this, will some guys never learn?
She just looks kind of uncomfortable in that photo, for sure.
I also think that he picked a picture where she is wearing a Milk Fed Milk Fed tshirt (is that a brand or something?) when she is talking about a vegan documentary that is clearly important to her to be petty. I might be reaching on that one, but he is a twat waffle (and put on a damn shirt) so I don’t care. 😉
He’s a big animal rights type as well (I’m sure that’s why she was a fan), so I don’t think he’d be petty about that, but I do applaud your instinct here.
Milk Fed was Sofia Coppola’s clothing line back in the 90s.
SO GROSS.
He CLEARLY posted a topless photo to make it seem intimate….BUT, you can 100% tell they are backstage at a venue based on the handwriting on the wall and the velvet musician art. After shows, musicians (is he really a musician?) get hot and sweaty and typically undress/shower.
So she goes backstage to say I really loved your show, he gets a photo with her. Later uses it to imply they were sleeping together. So, so gross.
My god that pic just makes it worse. He is so gross
My friend and I went to a Moby concert back in 1999 or 2000 and at some point a roadie came over and asked us if we wanted to go backstage and meet Moby after the show. We were 24 or 25 at the time. When we got back there, it was all girls about our age, free drinks, and probably other substances that we were unaware of. The whole thing had a very creepy vibe so we just had Moby sign our passes and got out as quickly as we could. I didn’t see anything specific and Moby wasn’t inappropriate with us in any way, but it felt gross.
I see Moby is channeling Terry Richardson in that picture.
YES!
So creeeeeepy
aww man, not you too Moby?? I used to really admire all the work he did for farmed animals… ugh.
It sounds like his brief dating just happened in his head and he believed it.
bingo. sounds like when I hung out with some guy friends from work when I was in college and one walked me home b/c it was late and then kissed me. I wasn’t expecting it so I didn’t avoid it in time but felt suuuuper awkward about it and pretended it never happened and was my normal polite self about it. Later another work friend told me he heard we had “made out.” Amazing how little some guys care about whether a woman reciprocates their feelings before they will just create a story in their heads about romantic involvement.
What’s so weird is how he chose to respond. Just say nothing on his part would have been a much better move. This looks like he is still hung up on some girl from what, 20 years ago?
I remember reading this claim when his book came out and thought (a) that’s gross and (b) I bet he’s overstating it and she didn’t date him so much as he creeped on her. I’m glad she corrected it.
This guy bragged about whipping out his penis and rubbing it against Trump. Again, (a) gross (it’s assault, regardless of how vile Trump is) and (b) I wonder if it happened. Dude seems to have some problem with the truth.
Ok so he says they dated, she says they didn’t. Why is everyone assuming she’s the one telling the truth? Maybe she’s embarrassed she actually dated him…or maybe he’s lying. NONE of us know the truth.
we think it’s true, because it matches the experience of SO many women.
THIS.
Don’t you think if they HAD dated it would have been all over the media? “Music super-star Moby dating budding young actress Natalie Portman”? He got caught lying and she called him out on it. Period.
maybe either way he should keep his mouth shut about it instead of using it to peddle books and jump on her publicity. maybe he should also just shut up when he says “we dated” and she says “i didn’t see it that way” THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY. THERE IS NO FURTHER ARGUMENT REQUIRED!
Nice try, but no. He was a grown-ass man and she was a teenager. He has a history of being creepy af and she called him out on his bullshit. You’re just trying to victim-blame.
How on earth is this victim blaming? I said EITHER one of them could be telling the truth orrrrr EITHER one of them could be lying.
@ME – Look at that photo he posted as a retort. He’s not wearing a shirt. He has a shit-eating grin on his face as if to say “look who I’ve bagged”. Have you not read any of the comments with PROOF that he’s a creep? The young women he’s targeted and invited back stage to party? This ALWAYS happens when a woman comes forward with a wholly believable story of unwanted sexual advances. “Oh, she’s lying, I didn’t do it. That’s her interpretation.”
BULLSHIT. He creeped on her and she shut him down. Sour grapes Moby?
Because when we look at all the facts available to us in this situation, it is fairly obvious, that the only person who thought they were dating is him. It is also a fact, that a stunning number of men who believe themselves to be “dating” a woman, who is merely polite to them. He has not helped his case by posting, which clearly highlights the fact that she he was a partially nude bald-headed dirty old man, and would make any sane person question, why this teenager would want anything to do with that.
Predatory men rewrite their histories with women — consciously or not — so that other men excuse his behavior (“he says they were dating,” “he gets so many girls, why would he force anyone?,” or just generally biggening him up because of toxic bro culture that treats sex as a game), so we can’t treat “he said, she said” as a level playing field. Why would the words of a thirty-something man hitting on a girl who JUST hit the legal age be given the same weight as the girl (now woman) herself, who talks about how uncomfortable he made her? If the reasons why the man would lie are so obvious, why should we bend over backward to doubt it?
I think it’s a bit of both. He thought they were dating or into each other and she was just hanging out with someone whose music she liked. Easy how that could be misconstrued in the mind of an egomaniac. BUT I don’t think a publisher would have allowed him to say they dated without covering their butts.
Except he claims she was 20, but she was born in 1981 so in 1999 she would have been 18…his publishers didn’t do jack and they didn’t care enough about her speaking out to cover their asses and do some basic fact checking.
Thank you Hollz! I would count that as true critical thinking skills.
Except they published the wrong age and didn’t reach out to her for inclusion in the book. They definitely left themselves open for a lawsuit.
Eating Animals was originally written in 2009, which matches her narrative of the book changing her views. She was good friends with the author, Jonathan Safran Foer, for a few years prior, so that probably contributed as well.
Yeah that pic is not creepy at all and she looks super into him 🙄
I mean she’s not denying knowing him. Is he implying because he is not wearing a shirt that something went on?? Gross!
I guess his definition of dating is different than hers. It seems she saw it as “oh we hung out a few times” and he saw it as “yeah she was into me” yikes he is really creepy!
He is creepy.
I have never liked him. He has always struck me as creepy and has a terrible reputation for being an all around jerk. What kills me are the WOMEN on his IG post defending him. One woman even had the audacity to say how dare Natalie say something “out of the blue” as if she should be fine with Moby writing about her. Someone on twitter posted the passage of the book where he mentions hers and even in his own words he states he was “trying” to be her boyfriend.
He should definitely have run it by Natalie first. That was his mistake. But to be honest, people have the right to defend him if they truly believe he’s telling the truth. Who are any of use to assume he’s the one lying? Maybe he is lying, maybe he’s not.
Don’t most celebs run things by the people involved in the experiences they reference in their books before they release it? The fact that he didn’t do that adds to the creepy factor.
What a delusional creep.
I’m 30 years old & I would NEVER date an 18 year old boy.
I can’t believe some of the above comments that are defending this age gap.
WTF
THIS! WTF?!
Seriously, what the hell kind of adult thinks that shit is acceptable? The late teens and twenties are a hugely dynamic time for mature character development. Even small age differences can be hugely significant at that range. I have absolutely no problem calling someone in their 30s going after somebody that age a creep. They’re dating that young for a reason – because their peers damn well know better than to tolerate their shit.
He thinks THAT pic would make everything look better???????
I know!!!! It makes him look so much worse. And the comment about “photo evidence”?
All he had to do was say “I’m sorry, my interpretation of the relationship was different than hers. I will respect her feelings on this matter.”
And it’s shameful that no one involved in the book publication didn’t bother to reach out to her to fact check.
so true
he would come off classy and confident and mature if he said:
“Im sorry. My interpretation of the relationship was diff than hers. I respect her and her feelings on the matter and will leave it at that.”
Instead he shows how needy narcissistic and childish he is…not to mention that creepy AF pic
Just because she is into his music doesn’t mean she is (or was) into him in a physical way. Guy is a creep for insinuating that they were together. He did it to make add a narrative for his book.
He’s also one of those nutty Scientologists, so disgusting all the way around!
Liz, that would be Beck, the one named musician Scientologist. And Beck was born into the religion. He did not choose it.
You choose your religion every day as you practise it. If you decide against it, you leave it (aka stop practising it or denounce it)
That’s a gross, agressive and flat out petty response from him. It was stupid of hom to even include that or that creepy picture in his book or reapond, but Moby should be called out in a bigger way now because it’s just one of a million uncomfortable ways men try and put themselves on women, literally and figuratively, irl and in their imaginations. So sick of men in this world right now. Ugh how did we regress so far.
+100
Uh, that pic is what he thinks corroborates that they used to date? They don’t look like a couple at all. She’s not leaning into him or anything, she just awkwardly stands there while a shirtless guy puts his arm around her. I mean, I believe he thinks they almost dated, but it also sounds like he was way off the mark (and I agree the age gap is gross. I’m 34 and would never romantically pursue an 18 or 19 year old). Didn’t she also have to deal with that author guy who left his wife for her because he was so convinced that’s all he needed to do for them to be together, and she had never had any romantic interest in him? It’s really crazy to me how differently two people can read the same situation, and how confident guys are that their version is correct.
Right???? That pic and post make him come off as absolutely DELUDED and ten times as creepy as before.
I bet I’m not the only woman who recognized this:
“…we only hung out a handful of times before I realised that this was an older man who was interested in me in a way that felt inappropriate.”
Yes, sadly.
You’re definitely not. I’m right there with you. Ugh, it’s too familiar.
Yes to this! I reflect back to my own experiences when I was in my late teens/very early twenties and the encounters I had in the Air National Guard with MARRIED co-workers in their thirties who also held positions of power. I was totally creeped on by older men who knew better. Crap! I was brand new to the world of adulting and sensed these encounters under the guise of friendly lunches were weird but truly didn’t know what to do. Older women co-workers intervened and also gave me advice.
Literally happened to me on the weekend. Granted I’m 38 but still, I was chatting to someone on a committee I work with at a social function. He struck me as a bit creepy but the talk was all work and I needed to discuss a couple of things, I leaned over the table to hear someone else who was talking at me and the committee dude grabbed my butt. Should have just listened to my instinct and walked away but god damn, is there ever an age where these pricks can just keep their hands to themselves?!
YES
I believe Natalie it really is inappropriate for 30 year old to wanted to hang out with a 18 girl fresh out high school. just because he post a picture of them together doesn’t make it any less Creepy i wonder how many girls have stories about moby being creepy towards them .
I’ve had a similar situation with age difference at 18, and the man in his 30s could have been my uncle, I see Natalie’s view perfectly.
My skin actually crawls for her when I look at that pic he posted with his skeezy hand on her shoulder.
I have a feeling it pretty much went exactly as Natalie said — they hung out a few times. Natalie perhaps realized after seeing him a few times that he was being inappropriate with her or taking things farther than she was comfortable with and ended whatever semblance of a friendship/relationship they had, but Moby thought they were dating/broke up. I don’t think anyone has to be “lying” here — they just viewed their time together differently.
A photo where you look like a creep in some green room is Not A Receipt Moby… gross
+100
There have always been rumors about Moby’s creeptastic ways. He is also claiming in this book to have dated Lana Del Rey who is 20 years younger than he is. Natalie looks totally skeeved out in this pic so I believe her more than him.
Ew.
Just, ew.
“Play” is one of my keynote albums of the late 90’s & after all the hoopla about Michael Jackson being even-more-definitely a molester, I’m getting kind of sad that all my favorite music from the old days is getting sort of tainted to me.
He’s just not a gentleman, even if they had actually dated; he shouldn’t have put it in his book, or he should have run it past her, and he DEFINITELY shouldn’t have insisted on contradicting her after she said she had felt anything, either then or now, was inappropriate.
And yeah, guys do that. I’m not anywhere near as gorgeous or “rare perfect butterfly” as Natalie Portman, but this sort of thing has happened to me before, albeit far less publicly. What I can never figure out is if dudes actually *believe* more happened than really did- a def possibility- or if they deliberately aggrandize things to make themselves feel/ look studlier, or what.
Gross.
I was on the bus yesterday and there was a sort of weird guy in front of me. A woman across the aisle from us got up for her stop and — out of absolutely nowhere, he hadn’t spoken to her the entire time — he touches her arm as she goes by and he says, “Would you go out with me sometime?” She looked at him and said, “No.” and he looked so offended! I don’t know what his internal story was, but it sure didn’t match reality.
WHY ARE MEN SUCH CREEPS???
I was done with Moby…when he came out with an essay…I think it was last year…stating that people receiving SNAP benefits…shouldn’t be able to by, what he termed “junk food”….
Into the TRASH he went!
I forgot about that! He’s been trash for a while.
Unfortunately junk food is in the eye of the beholder. What’s healthy for one person (fruits) is unhealthy for another (diabetic). So I actually would agree that we’d be better off giving people with benefits only healthy choices if there were such a thing. For some people pizza is a health food while for others it’s junk. Also, being vegan seems to benefit some and harm others. I thought I was eating healthy for a diabetic. Then caused myself unbelievable damage. I’m no longer able to judge people’s food choices. But the sad fact is that our poor people are eating the wrong foods, as they’re sick, obese, diabetic and unhealthy so if we really did know the right way to eat that was foolproof I’d be for supporting that decision.
Really good comment, @Sis.
(And I submitted below comment at wrong place, it was for #1, sorry).
I think @bros is offering a good perspective here. In a theoretical situation- 18 is legal, 2 working professionals in a similar field (both successfully so) but without bearing on each others’ careers…. I mean, I admit I come from a rural place, but…excuse me for saying, I feel we are infantalizing our young adults in ways that are not healthy for them. 15ish years…(as an adult, with a high-school diploma, potentially available for military service, although I suppose it depends on the person)….is just not that much. Also, in my (years and years of) painful personal experience- it is ineffective, disempowering and inappropriate to expect others to intuit your feelings and respond to them if you don’t know how to do so yourself, and I don’t want us to STILL be teaching our young girls that crappy lesson. You have to use your (Valid) feelings…to inform the course of Action to take. Judge folks then on how they respond to your Statement/Actions, not your private feelings. I get it, but…you have to take your own personal responsibility for it. And you can’t force some people (no one in the above story is implied here) to be better people- all you can do is make them “give space”. Like a dog. I know how many might argue with that, but it is literally the only thing that helped me move forward, and I believe it to be very practical. To my mind, the “critical thinking skills” of the original poster were working fine. (And I know it can get unsafe out there- hopefully we are having each others’ backs when somebody does try to safely set a boundary in real time- although, frankly, I’ve been seeing less of that out in the wild as I might have hoped).
I read an article yesterday that excerpted some of Moby’s new book. Apparently he also tried to woo a pre-fame Lana Del Rey. I’m intrigued to hear what she has to say about that.
he’s a judgmental, pompous POS and his gaslight of her is GROSS. they both know what happened and just b/c he took an after concert picture with her with his shirt off and kept it in a shoe box under his bed DOES NOT mean they dated. i wouldn’t believe a word of what some jerk who used selective language to imply he slept with a famous barely legal actress who then had the audacity to argue with her about HER OWN experience. fuck him.
+100
Very well said!
Eminem had this guy pegged.
For real.
Remember when Natalie Portman did that rap on SNL? Now I can picture her rapping these Eminem lyrics. lol
“You 36 year old bald-headed bag
You don’t know me
You’re too old
Let go
It’s over
Nobody listens to techno”
I believe both Natalie and Moby. I believe that they dated (had sex) and that Natalie looks back and realizes the relationship, however brief, was inappropriate. Heck, even a friendship between an 18 or 20 year old with a 30-something is inappropriate. I’m beginning to think that so much of heterosexual coupling is based on awful power dynamics. It’s crazy how common Natalie’s story is.
Has anyone read his book? There’s a lot of disturbing sex told really matter-of-factly. Moby doesn’t try AT ALL to present himself in the best light or present excuses but he doesn’t articulate how exactly he abused his fame and money against women. I’ll still listen and support both of them
Only that’s not “Natalie’s story.” That’s someone else’s version of events, so your “support” for her is meaningless.
I don’t understand, I think I’m misreading. Could you explain why my support is meaningless?
Because you’re calling her a liar.
I don’t know why you would believe Natalie that nothing happened between them. Seems simple to me.
She very clearly says he wanted to be friends, they hung out a few times, and then she felt he was interested in an inappropriate way. That in no way implies any kind of physical relationship.
Yup – I would put money down their time together would have comprised hanging out a few times over a couple of weeks.
‘Hey, wanna come check out how recording an album works?’
‘Sure, that would be cool!’
And then he probably tried to kiss her, and she maybe fended him off a couple of times then realised he really wasn’t interested in being her friend.
To him that was ‘dating’, to her that was hanging out as friends with an interesting and talented guy she wasn’t interested romantically in because she liked handsome boys her own age, and she probably didn’t even think he saw her as a romantic prospect because of the age gap. Until it got weird.
It’s a lesson many of us learn at about 17 or 18, when all of a sudden we move out into the bigger world.
IIRC Natalie Portman’s parents were very protective of her so she was a lot more sheltered than the usual child star. Wouldn’t surprise me if she were a comparatively naive 18yo.
Having sex does not equal dating – and you can date without having sex.
Also, Moby seems like the type to equate a woman paying any attention to him as dating. I believe Natalie.
I dislike Moby. I understand why Eminem mocked him. At his peak fame, I found him to be very uncool. I also question NP’s taste in men. Except for Gael Garcia Bernal and Nathan Bogle, she has a thing for unattractive, intellectual (or pseudo intellectual), hipster types. I remember that thing with Jonathan Foer. They had that pretentious, corny-ass email exchanges that were revealed a few years ago. Though I think it was only Foer who flirted with her thinking she had feelings for him. Maybe this was the case with Moby? He thought she liked him. The rumors of them dating floated around years ago so this wasn’t surprising. But the age difference, yuck.
She may have accidentally given free publicity to a book that no one would otherwise have known about or read.
Jezz, his justification makes it even more icky. She stated she was young, naive and a fan. She did not specify what that hanging out entailed (it may have well been something physical/sexual) but the point is she says she realized it was just wrong and creepy. And by responding he almost likes people to think he is a creep, praying on young fans AND being successful at that. Anyway, he is still alive?
It can be consensual and inappropriate. As someone who dated a 34 year old when I was 18/19 I can definitely say that it’s totally creepy. The human brain isn’t fully formed until age 25, specifically the decision making part of the brain. An 18 year old girl rarely has the agency or self awareness to navigate a relationship with someone that much older.
Also architect friends of mine designed both his cafe and his condo development and he refused to let them publish the project, gave them no credit and claimed to have designed them himself. Total douchebro.
Love your screen name!
That sucks about the design work. I’m not surprised he takes credit for it all.
Bitchyarchitect, if the decision-making part of the brain is not fully formed at 18, then how is that consensual? That wouldn’t be true consent, that would be a “fooled into thinking you consented”, or “convincing yourself you consented because the alternative SUCKS.”
I like your screen name too.
maybe thats the issue here – he is a douche!
Sounds like they werent on the same page. She was a naive 18 year old who thought he was actually interested in being her friend. He was trying to get in her pants. When she realized that, she was creeped out. We all had the moment when we were young and beautiful and realize sometimes men want to be more than friends.
I don’t think it’s wrong for men to pursue women if they are of age. Sounds like Moby backed off and got the hint and didn’t do anything inappropriate and Natalie was not into him AT ALL
If he was inebriated as he said he was during that time how would he even remember if he dated her or not?! He doesn’t come across as reliable at all. When I was 18 and 19 I hung out with a few guys that thought we were “dating” or “talking” and being a naive teenager I honestly thought they just wanted to be my friend and I had not romantic interest in them and they of course got upset when I finally mentioned this. People need to be more direct if they think they are “dating” someone and actually ask instead of making up fake relationships in their minds.
@Jaded
It won’t let me reply up top so I’m trying to see if it will let me write this here.
Firstly, that photo was added as an “update” to the story AFTER I wrote my comment. Secondly, I never said she was lying OR that he was lying. I don’t know much about Moby but what comments from women are you talking about? I think you need to chill and read a person’s comments properly next time before you accuse them of something they didn’t even say.
Soooooooooo… I began dating a 33 year old when I was 19. He was my boss at a record store I worked at while in college. He ended up being a complete asshole, but we were together for several years and I moved from Chicago to NYC and Los Angeles with him. Most of my friends were totally creeped out by it, but he was truly my first real love, clueless as I was.
YOU were not the problem. You were 19 and inexperienced. It’s the older adult that’s inappropriate. It’s beyond irresponsible to project your adult desires on an immature mind that’s still growing and learning. Ability to consent legally is not free reign to ignore other ethical quandaries, and I tire of hearing the argument because 99% of the time it’s older men with younger women.
I think we all know how gross Moby sounds.
What I REALLY want to know is WHO in their right mind even thought that Moby’s life story was THAT interesting that he needed a memoir?
WHO?
“Photographic evidence”? What the heck does that even mean? I’ve taken pictures with well known people, sometimes several times, and they’re often smiling or even laughing in them and, cause I worked in sports, even occasionally shirtless. We did not date.
I just saw someone quote twitter that pic with the line “RT if you’ve made the face Natalie is making while a man put his arm around you”–in the #MeToo era, we should all know that face, especially when it’s a young woman who’s grown up in a society that demands that she tolerates men doing creepy, non-consensual acts to her and her body. The pic shows us something, and it’s definitely not what Moby thinks it shows us.
Guys, pls watch his interview with Wendy Williams. He is brutally honest about so many things, I believe him.
Nope. Not only this isn’t the first time BY FAR that we in music circles have heard about what a megacreep Moby is, this is a clear act of power over a woman’s right to tell her own story about her own life, played up as “Wow, this hot movie starlet was flirting with ME” to win the approval of other men. Do not even try to justify this. Gross.
lol
Lol, your comment is sarcasm (I hope).
Moby’s been super creepy and problematic since forever, and while I am not a big fan of Portman’s acting or her vegan activism, she doesn’t deserve him forcing himself into her life story like this. No one does.
Do you guys remember that Jonathon Safron left his wife for Natalie then told Natalie after http://www.pajiba.com/celebrities_are_better_than_you/that-time-jonathan-safran-foer-left-his-wife-for-natalie-portman-and-natalie-was-like-no-thanks.php
EWWWW. That photo is shades of Terry Richardson:
https://perezhilton.com/terry-richardson-sex-offender-change-org-petition/
It’s time for a National “interrupt men” Day. ALLL Day. Or perhaps a National Guys sit down and STFU Day.
I have had enough.
I used to be Moby fan. I listened to a podcast where I learned that he stole the cds that he used to get his samples from for his album Play from his friend and never gave his friend any thanks, credit or financial compensation. I lost all respect. When Portman says he creeped on her, I believe it – and that’s before he posted this creepy photo of them.
What a d*ck Moby is. I hope his friend learned a valuable lesson after that happened. It’s a cut throat business for sure. You quickly learn to trust no one.
EEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW! He proved her point with this follow-up Instagram post.
Trying to make her look like a liar and prove they dated by posting this random photo? Saying he has proof? What an a$$.
He claims they were friends after… then why wouldn’t they have fact checked with her?
He looks like an entitled creep. He thinks they were dating bc he doesn’t want to admit she was not interested. Gross.
People strike up friendships that the other person mistakes as dating all the time. Hanging out with the opposite sex is an excellent, efficient way to network and mostly there isn’t any dating or sex involved. This is called socializing. Why the debate? Moby needs to chill. I hung out with lots of men, young and old, when I was young just to see what the world was like. Most clued in very quick that I was just young and flitting about and wasn’t interested in dating. Moby has a case of wishful thinking. He’s always been a beta control freak.