IT IS one of the best adverts for abstinence you'll ever come across. On a brisk autumn morning in Manchester, an easyJet flight from Malta touches down, taxis across the apron, and comes to a halt. Passengers begin to disembark. One catches your eye. About 50 years of age and stocky in nature, he is disrobing. Quite why is not yet clear; perhaps the lack of clothing will assist him in his forthcoming duel with the pilot—a battle which, based on repeated asseverations, seems to be assured. Alas, the pilot never shows. The naked man instead staggers away, urinates against a terminal building, and is eventually downed by a policeman's Taser.
Gulliver's more cloistered readers may struggle to believe such incidents really occur in British airports. Any doubts can be laid to rest by viewing the camera-phone footage helpfully supplied to the Manchester Evening News. Its story was published in October 2013, alongside urgent pleas to phone the newsdesk if "you know who the man is".
Though comical in retrospect, first-hand encounters with drunk, irate or mentally disturbed passengers are rarely a laughing matter. At the very least, they cause discomfort, embarrassment and inconvenience to fellow travellers—who, if seated near an agitator, have little possibility of retreat. In the most severe cases, they can endanger the safety of all on-board. Thus it was with a hearty “hear hear” that Gulliver learned about the tough stance now being taken by Jet2, a leisure carrier based in northern England, when it comes to dealing with drunkards.
Jet2's staff encounter more than their fair share of boozy passengers. The budget airline makes its money largely by shipping excitable Brits to holiday resorts in Spain, Portugal and Greece. For many of its young clientele, the promise of sun, sea and sex is simply overpowering. "The party seems to start way earlier in the process these days," Phil Ward, Jet2's boss, told the Times. "There seems to be a tendency to want to get to the airport, have a good drink before you get on-board, and continue the party when you're in the air." According to the UK Civil Aviation Authority, incidents of unruly behaviour have risen threefold in three years. It is a nationwide problem. Those of us who travel regularly from London's secondary airports—Gatwick, Luton or Stansted—have become desensitised to the sight of young men, dressed in women's clothing, downing pints at 8am.
So it was in May, when Tom Washington boarded a Jet2 flight to Majorca with 22 of his closest friends. (Yes, 22.) The jovial mood was reflected by the fact that most in the party wore female cabin-crew uniforms. But Mr Washington sought to elevate the milieu further. His preferred strategy, without giving too much detail, was to deploy an adult toy during the on-board safety demonstration, before later exposing a tattoo of the Disney character Pinocchio–which had, with much forethought and wit, been strategically positioned in a sensitive area.
Again, I hasten to add, funny antics indeed. Enacted in a bawdy nightclub on a Friday night, such loutish conduct would hardly warrant a second thought. But witnessing a complete breakdown of societal norms whilst crammed into a small metal tube hurtling at 500mph six miles high is unnerving. Mr Washington's crass behaviour, quite rightly, terrified his fellow passengers.
Welcome news then that Jet2 slapped a lifetime ban on the miscreant. He wasn't even allowed to board the return flight. What's more, the airline has now seized on the incident as a watershed moment, vowing to respond with an iron fist to any future breaches of the peace. “We are a family airline and holiday company," Mr Ward says. "These are people who have chosen to take their well-earned summer breaks with us, and we want them to have a wonderful time … Under no circumstances will we allow the disruptive few to spoil the experience for the majority.”
The exasperated airline boss is seeking industry backing for his clampdown. He is already working with two bodies—the British Air Transport Association and the Airport Operators Association—to hammer out a code of conduct for dealing with unruly passengers. Globally, the International Civil Aviation Organization last year unveiled the Montreal Protocol 2014, which closes legal loopholes and empowers airline and airport staff to act more firmly against troublemakers. But the protocol needs to be ratified by 22 governments before it is enforceable. In the meantime, readers are encouraged to keep their camera phones at the ready. The promise of online humiliation may persuade some oafish travellers to rein in their behaviour.
